What's the best way to refer to a penis in a casual, but not necessarily overtly sexual, way, akin to saying dick in English?
Take for example this sentence from the autobiography of Ice-T:
I had a catheter up my dick and I just lay there [...] with my whole shit exposed.
I feel confident that no one would expect Ice-T to refer to his male member as a penis while recounting his “gangster life,” especial when the phrase fucked up follows shortly afterwards. I would also not expect anyone to imagine he has its sexual function in the forefront of his mind (he may be concerned for it on a sexual level, but a body in pain is first of all a body in pain, and not an apparatus in pain).