Zwei kölsche Putzfrauen bei der Arbeit. Die eine: „Ich mach’ Diät.“ Darauf die andere: „Jot, dann maach ich die Finster.“

I can guess that 'Diät' here is a play on words for something like 'die …' but fail to see what it is.

  • Note that even native German speakers will fail to see the point if they are not familiar with Kölsch. – xehpuk Aug 13 at 19:47

You are right. It's a play on words for Diät. But it only works out for the Cologne dialect (or similar ones).

Ich mach' Diät


I'm dieting.

But these two women are from Cologne and in their dialect it can be understood as

Ich mach die Ääd (Ääd = Erde)

which can be translated as

I will take care of (clean) the ground.

Sooo ... the one cleaner says "I'm dieting", but the other one understands "I will clean the floor". Therefore she responds she will clean the windows.

Einen Witz zu erklären ist wie einen Frosch zu sezieren. Du bist danach schlauer aber der Frosch ist tot. ^^

  • 9
    Einen Frosch seziert man hoffentlich erst, wenn er sowieso schon tot ist ^^ – jonathan.scholbach Aug 11 at 18:21
  • 1
    Stichwort: Vivisektion ... – 0xC0000022L Aug 11 at 19:57
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    Elaboration for non-German speakers: "die Erde" (the earth) is often informally used to mean "the floor". Even when it is a non ground level floor in a building. – rackandboneman Aug 12 at 8:25
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    Oh, and: "machen" (make) is also very often used to mean "handle, take care of, deal with" – rackandboneman Aug 12 at 8:28
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    @rackandboneman Must be a local thing then, because in Austria "der Boden" (the floor) is way more common then "die Erde", the latter being almost exclusively being used to refer to the physical ground or the celestial body. – MechMK1 Aug 12 at 12:38

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